Best 100+ Sarcastic Quotes and Witty Funny Sayings

By | June 27, 2017

Looking for sarcastic quotes and sarcastic status for whatsapp and Facebook? If yes then you’re at the right place. We have unique and latest collection of sarcastic quotes and sarcastic status which you can copy paste and use As Facebook, Twitter, Instagram and WhatsApp.

According to Google Sarcasm means “the use of irony to mock or convey contempt”. If you want to know more about the same click here. We are sure you will get to know everything about sarcasm and being sarcastic.

sarcasm quotes sayings

sarcasm quotes sayings

Social networks do not run away from this, and the best sarcastic phrases can also happen on WhatsApp. Know some of these sarcastic phrases and apply them wherever you like.

Sarcastic Quotes

  • You are about as useful as a white crayon.
  • Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until they speak.
  • Silence is golden. duct tape is silver.
  • Violence won’t solve anything…But it sure makes me feel good.
  • You go, girl! And don’t come back.
  • I am busy right now, can I ignore you some other time?
  • I never forget a face, but in your case I’ll be glad to make an exception.
  • Think I am sarcastic? Watch me pretend to care!
  • Thank you for leaving my side when I was alone… I realized I can do so much without you.
  • I’ll try being nicer if you try being smarter.
  • Expect nothing and you’ll never be disappointed!
  • I’m sorry while you were talking I was trying to figure where the hell you got the idea I cared.
  • On the other hand, you have different fingers.
  • I thought I had seen the pinnacle of stupid… Then I met you.
  • You’re unique just like everyone else!
  • Find your patience before I lose mine.
  • I clapped because it’s finished, not because I like it.
  • Just keep talking, I yawn when I’m interested.
  • You always do me a favor, when you shut up!
  • My loyalty cannot be bought, however, it can be rented.
  • Are you really stupid or you are just pretending?
  • My imaginary friend says that you need a therapist.
  • She smiled modestly, more sarcastically than flattered.
  • Sarcasm: Helping the intelligent politely tolerate the obtuse for thousands of years.

Sarcastic Quotes For Men

In love, the two parts are the same, however, often a woman has a little difficulty overcoming the end of a relationship, especially when her heart breaks. Find among these 20 phrases the best that goes with what you want to express.

  • “Do you help me find something?” “What?” “All the time I’ve lost with you.”
  • “Before I crossed the ocean for you, today I do not cross my fingers”
  • “Be careful, any day you’ll call my heart and it’ll make you busy”
  • “The woman who is lucky with men does not know how lucky she is”
  • “You are living proof that a man can live without a brain”
  • “His eternity lasted only two months”
  • “You were the best part of my worst mistake”
  • “You’re a perfect defect artifact”
  • “Your heart is as busy as your phone line”
  • “It’s not tears, it’s internal detoxification”
  • “I wanted to ask you for your ex’s number to form a kind of support group”
  • “You left when I needed you and came back when I did not care”
  • “Sorry, I thought you were the love of my life … Next!”
  • “I told him, ‘Bring whatever you want’ … and brought me lies”
  • “Criticizing my faults will not diminish their”
  • “If playing with my feelings was a sport, you would have a gold medal”
  • “I do not miss you, I miss the person I thought you were”
  • “It’s not that I’m cruel, I’ve learned to use my heart less”
  • “My ex says ‘you’ll never find someone like me’ … Well, that’s the idea!”
  • “Thank you for hurting me, you made me stronger”

Sarcastic Quotes For Women

Of course many of the phrases mentioned above can also be dedicated to women, but here you can find some specially designed for them. You can use the ironic phrases to conquer it or else to express some negative feeling in a funniest and tolerable way as long as she understands this kind of humor.

  • “I drowned in an ocean called a woman”
  • “Sometimes I think of who will fall into his arms and do not know whether to laugh or feel compassion”
  • “Advice: in the future try to be less intelligent … forgiveness: evident”
  • “Sexual inactivity is dangerous … it produces horns!”
  • “Tell me … does your pride kiss better than I do?”
  • “I searched the dictionary … and you mean nothing”
  • She: “I love you!”! Thank you, I’m allergic to lies.
  • “If you find yourself the last Coca-Cola in the desert, I like beer”
  • “You can not forget the Queen, playing checkers”
  • “This is very much in you, you should take it away.” “What?” “Your pride”
  • “If you find a princess and do not know in which bed she left the crown”
  • “So many times you let me fall, I learned to fly”
  • “I do not hold a grudge, I have a good memory”
  • “The cats say ‘meow’, the ‘muu’ cows and the bitches ‘I swear he’s my friend’
  • “If you will not comply, do not deceive or promise”
  • “Wait for me, what I get from you”
  • “Do not worry about what I have, do what you lack”
  • “If you do not like me, change you”
  • “Tomorrow I will take into account your opinion, today I do not care”
  • “There are three things that always go out: the sun, the moon and the truth”

Sarcastic Love Quotes

Due to the nature of irony, love-related phrases tend to be headed for disappointment and the end of relationships, which is why they are ideal to send some hints with these sarcastic phrases of love for status. Sarcastic words can apply to any situation, even in matters of the heart. Choose from these ironic love phrases and express yourself on social networks.

  • “If this is love, I prefer to watch television, it is more educational and less possessive”
  • “I hated you as much as I loved you”
  • “Blessed are they that wait for nothing, for they shall never be disappointed”
  • “Saying goodbye was as difficult as writing this sentence”
  • “If I still love you?” Silence is the best answer to silly questions “
  • “If someone has betrayed you, you will want to play on the porch, but remember, you have horns, not wings”
  • “It is bad manners to say” I love you “with my mouth full of lies”
  • “Create memories and tears will come”
  • “Dear Cupid, more aim next time, try to give in the indicated one”
  • “Beware! Happiness of two, envy of thousands”
  • “Love is the son of illusion and the father of delusion”
  • “If love is blind, why is intimacy so popular?
  • “Three things you can not hide: a cough, poverty and love”
  • “Love is like war: easy to start, difficult to finish”
  • “No one has dominion over love, but he dominates things”
  • “Love is blind, let it pass”
  • “It was such an impossible love that it became eternal”
  • “Someday I’ll start what ended”
  • “Love now, pay later”
  • “I’m half the orange with more feelings of flesh”

 

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